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[Return to Home] [Return to Reflection Room] Searching for Tomorrow: I was recently posed with the question why it is that people always seem to fall for the ones they can't have. The question left me feeling a little strange, because well, what is it that we really *do* 'have'? Maybe that's the problem. It's probably uniquely my own view of the world, but the way I see things, none of us really "have" anything. Life isn't about owning or having or possessing- it's about living the moments, experiencing, and when we can, giving and sharing what it is that is beautiful within us. Everything material around us is borrowed, or jointly shared with the rest of creation, with the select few we call our friends, whatever form they come in. Even the things we 'have' are all borrowed- these things we use while we're here are all useless to us once we're gone. Nothing belongs to us except our thoughts, our experiences, and our existence, and even that is fleeting and borrowed in the vastness of this space between birth and death. If all we live for is to own, then we've miss the pleasure of living found in the moments, found in the wonder as seen through a child's eyes. We waste our moments trying to possess those things that we will ultimately lose, when we should be spending our time enjoying the beauty of what we do have around us, that exists around us, because of us, inspite of us. They are things that have no price, no physical substance, no value but that which we give it. When you have no desire to own or to possess, you are free and always shall be. And it is then that you begin to realize what's really important in life and enjoy those things you do have. You could spend your time brooding about why you can't have things, but why? There are so many other things, better things you could spend your time *doing*. Life is much too short to waste what few precious moments we have left in the pursuit of things that ultimately have no meaning to us. Doesn't it make more sense to spend your time building the warmth and the treasury that exists only within your heart, your soul, and your being? Recently someone on an email list had something interesting written in their signature file. It went as follows: "Gather those you love at your side and in your heart. Measure your relationships not by gifts that increase your possesions, but by gifts that enrich your heart; loyalty, thoughtfulness, caring and burden sharing. Don't allow ignorance, fears or insecurities define what you should do or can do. Challange limits and actions that are impure and false; TRANSEND THEM! " Whoever wrote that was on to something. Kahil Gibran, the famous Lebanese writer, also wrote that you only truly give when you give of yourself. He was right. As was Mother Theresa, the Dalai Lama, and the countless others who wrote and taught this message before them. We are all searching in the vastness of this world. We often search for the answers to questions that we may very well never find. Sometimes we think we have found ourselves, when in reality we may only have some of the pieces. Some we may have even intentionally or unintentionally buried long ago, hidden from obvious view until one day it surprises us when it's accidentally uncovered. For all of our thoughts, for all of our attempts to explore the mysteries within and without, for all we think we know and understand of ourselves, very few outside of ourselves can ever really see what truly lies in our hearts and minds. And very often, the closest most ever come to understanding us is in the perception of our actions, or rather, how they interpret them from what they understand of us and what they understand of the world. Each of us sees the world differently. In the end the only person we really understand is ourselves. And what we see of the world, our friends, and our experiences is exclusive to each of us alone. We should go through the minutes and the seconds doing the best we can to be, and to remain true to ourselves and what we believe. We should never take for granted the things in this existence, tangible or otherwise, that we truly value. We all find our way eventually, through the hard times, through the mistakes, and the moments that force us to take a hard look at ourselves and re-evaluate the path we're taking. We are irreversibly shaped by our experiences, by those around us, and those who are closest to us. Always continue to question, to look inside ourselves and breathe. It is how the universe has and undoubtedly will always work. So enjoy the moments, savour them, appreciate them. Accept the simple fleeting ephermal beauty of what *is* at this moment, despite of and inspite of, the background noise that clutters around us trying to confuse and distract us. The past is gone. The future is coming. And the moments here and now are the only things we will really ever have, directly shaping who it is we will eventually become. Albert Wang |